Remember that cute little dog, and the nice old man in the cowboy hat this morning? And you wanted to eat his dog? Well now that I'm using the ferocious WATER BOTTLE it sure is making you snap back to reality faster isn't it? Not that you don't forget in 15 seconds...but still.
On our walk tonight, I spot this dog in a yard. Perfect test! I angle towards the dog, about your size but a puppy, maybe a year at most. I realize the dog is off his leash. Shit. To not create a panic, I turn back to the road slightly, and he prances after us.
You tried SO HARD to look at him didn't you? How'd those metal prongs feel jabbing into your jugular buddy?! Got put in your place didn't you! I even slowed down and let the dog sniff you. I timidly stopped walking, the leash taught, and you sat down. Just like you were supposed to. I pet the dog, keeping you at arms length, he rolled onto his back, swatting at me, and then, tail wagging, approached you, oblivious to your 'leash makes me kill small innocent creatures' attitude. And then...you played with him!
GOOD BOY! I cannot say it enough. I can't believe that this happened. I literally had just called Jeff today and spoke to him about you because I was worried that there was just no helping you. Now I know that it is possible. You really can do this buddy. We really can. Even though I want to murder you and you embarrass the hell out of me sometimes, someday, you'll be just fine, my special needs baby.
P.S. I still slightly regret not naming you Schitzo when I had the chance...
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